Having made the commitment to be 24x7-40 (out everywhere but work, for now) I knew there would come a time when I would either be outed or have to out myself in order to complete a financial transaction.
Well, I was put to *that* test tonight! Julie and I were out grocery shopping. She had already purchased her stuff and was just waiting for me to finish checking out.
I used the self check out lane and everything went normally until I swiped my credit card. The cash register said "Please wait for assistance".
The lady controlling the register came up to me and said, "Ma'am, I just need to see a photo ID. It's normal for purchases over fifty dollars."
My purchase was well over that. I took a deep breath, reached into my purse, pulled out my clutch opened it and showed her my drivers license.
She visibly jumped (it was the beard, I'm sure!) but made no other remark and said "Thank you ma'am. That will be fine." I said thank you. and finished putting my purchases into my cart. She was very nice.
I asked if I could get a shopping card application. She said yes, but I would have to fill it out there. But I would get my card immediately. I wanted to fill it out at home so I said I would fill it out the next time I came. She smiled and said "Have a nice night!"
Other than being a little shaken by the experience, I wasn't upset by it. I didn't go screaming into the night. I didn't purge, I didn't swear that I'll never go back there. I will shop there again, and quite probably be assisted by that same lady when I go back for my discount card.
There was a time not all that very long ago that I would have been terrified and severely traumatized by that experience. I would have questioned my femininity and probably made it a topic with my therapist.
That was then, this is now.
I'm going to transition before the end of the year. Maybe sooner, maybe a lot sooner. So I have to be ready for this. Until I can get my name legally changed and my ID's properly re-issued, I have to be ready for this. It's GOING to happen again and again.
This is the life I committed to. I am all woman. Society just hasn't quite caught up yet.
I'm willing to give them time to adjust.
-Sandy
Well, I was put to *that* test tonight! Julie and I were out grocery shopping. She had already purchased her stuff and was just waiting for me to finish checking out.
I used the self check out lane and everything went normally until I swiped my credit card. The cash register said "Please wait for assistance".
The lady controlling the register came up to me and said, "Ma'am, I just need to see a photo ID. It's normal for purchases over fifty dollars."
My purchase was well over that. I took a deep breath, reached into my purse, pulled out my clutch opened it and showed her my drivers license.
She visibly jumped (it was the beard, I'm sure!) but made no other remark and said "Thank you ma'am. That will be fine." I said thank you. and finished putting my purchases into my cart. She was very nice.
I asked if I could get a shopping card application. She said yes, but I would have to fill it out there. But I would get my card immediately. I wanted to fill it out at home so I said I would fill it out the next time I came. She smiled and said "Have a nice night!"
Other than being a little shaken by the experience, I wasn't upset by it. I didn't go screaming into the night. I didn't purge, I didn't swear that I'll never go back there. I will shop there again, and quite probably be assisted by that same lady when I go back for my discount card.
There was a time not all that very long ago that I would have been terrified and severely traumatized by that experience. I would have questioned my femininity and probably made it a topic with my therapist.
That was then, this is now.
I'm going to transition before the end of the year. Maybe sooner, maybe a lot sooner. So I have to be ready for this. Until I can get my name legally changed and my ID's properly re-issued, I have to be ready for this. It's GOING to happen again and again.
This is the life I committed to. I am all woman. Society just hasn't quite caught up yet.
I'm willing to give them time to adjust.
-Sandy
-------------------------------------------------
June 12, 2007
Just an FYI.
I went back to that same grocery store just yesterday. I used the self service register. As fate would have it, I swiped my credit card and sure enough, the total was over fifty dollars. The register came up with "Please Wait for Assistance".
The lady controlling the register came over to me and said "Ma'am, I just need to see a photo ID. It's normal for purchases over fifty dollars". I swear it was the exact same sentence said the exact same way. It was deje-vu all over again...
But this time it was a different lady.
This time I reached into my purse and took out my wallet and showed her my drivers license. She glanced at the name and verified that it was the same name on the credit card and said "Thank you, ma'am."
I thanked her and smiled broadly back at her. She had no idea why I was smiling so much...
-Sandy(My drivers license picture looks much better now!)
I went back to that same grocery store just yesterday. I used the self service register. As fate would have it, I swiped my credit card and sure enough, the total was over fifty dollars. The register came up with "Please Wait for Assistance".
The lady controlling the register came over to me and said "Ma'am, I just need to see a photo ID. It's normal for purchases over fifty dollars". I swear it was the exact same sentence said the exact same way. It was deje-vu all over again...
But this time it was a different lady.This time I reached into my purse and took out my wallet and showed her my drivers license. She glanced at the name and verified that it was the same name on the credit card and said "Thank you, ma'am."
I thanked her and smiled broadly back at her. She had no idea why I was smiling so much...
-Sandy(My drivers license picture looks much better now!)
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