In just over a month, I make my trek to Doylestown for my GRS. All my travel and lodging arrangements have been made, most of my medical tests are done and shipped to Dr. Christine. I'll complete my medical tests early in March since the results have to be no older than two weeks. My genital electrolysis is complete with a touch up scheduled for the end of the month.
It's just a matter of time and watching the clock.
Unlike my FFS/BA which was like an unending wait for "Christmas", this seems much different. If I could put it into some sort of context, I just want it done and behind me. I think women who are pregnant may have the same feeling. Being pregnant can be really tedious and the process of childbirth can be REALLY uncomfortable, but the blessed result is worth all the wait.
I think that's where I'm at right now. I am not so much looking forward to the operation, so much as I am really anxious to have all this behind me. Most of my life has completed it's transition and this is the last piece of the puzzle. I'm not necessarily looking forward to seeing my newly formed genitalia for the first time as I just want it all to be over so I can complete my transition and no longer feel like I am half and half.
I know I'll be taking on a new habit that will be with me for the rest of my life (dilation) and that intercourse will be on a spectrum from numb to mind blowing with a small but measurable chance that I may never have sensation there at all. All of us that walk this path have to realize that. And I think that to most of us, that wasn't the reason we got on this roller coaster. To us, being a woman is so much more, so many things, that simply having a (neo)-vagina doesn't come close to making us feel complete as women, but not having one is like a puzzle with a piece missing (or if you want to be a bit crass a puzzle with a piece that sticks out).
"Like sand through an hourglass, these are the Days of Our Lives." (So-Crates from "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure")
-Sandy
It's just a matter of time and watching the clock.
Unlike my FFS/BA which was like an unending wait for "Christmas", this seems much different. If I could put it into some sort of context, I just want it done and behind me. I think women who are pregnant may have the same feeling. Being pregnant can be really tedious and the process of childbirth can be REALLY uncomfortable, but the blessed result is worth all the wait.
I think that's where I'm at right now. I am not so much looking forward to the operation, so much as I am really anxious to have all this behind me. Most of my life has completed it's transition and this is the last piece of the puzzle. I'm not necessarily looking forward to seeing my newly formed genitalia for the first time as I just want it all to be over so I can complete my transition and no longer feel like I am half and half.
I know I'll be taking on a new habit that will be with me for the rest of my life (dilation) and that intercourse will be on a spectrum from numb to mind blowing with a small but measurable chance that I may never have sensation there at all. All of us that walk this path have to realize that. And I think that to most of us, that wasn't the reason we got on this roller coaster. To us, being a woman is so much more, so many things, that simply having a (neo)-vagina doesn't come close to making us feel complete as women, but not having one is like a puzzle with a piece missing (or if you want to be a bit crass a puzzle with a piece that sticks out).
"Like sand through an hourglass, these are the Days of Our Lives." (So-Crates from "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure")
-Sandy
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